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Confession: I Watched “Never Say Never”

February 1, 2012 in Family, Friends, Fun, Music, My Life with 0 Comments

I never thought I’d have a reason to watch Justin Bieber’s documentary (Rockumentary? Hairumentary?)…

Katie (My little sister through Big Brothers Big Sisters) and I usually hang out on Tuesday afternoons. We usually plan a week ahead. Last week was her birthday, so we skipped our outing. She asked if this week, I could pick her up from school, take her to our house and watch “Never Say Never” with her. So we did. Katie and I watched the first half of the movie together and then were joined by an almost thirteen year-old guy when he got home from school (name withheld intentionally).

Katie is a true Belieber. She loves everything about Justin Bieber. You should have seen her birthday party last week–Biebertastic to the max! It was fun to watch the movie with her.

Two things I didn’t know:

Justin Bieber plays instruments. Drums, guitar, piano (I think). That always kind of gives a singer a little more credibility for me.

He also is a really good dancer.

One things I guessed correctly about:

There are a lot of scenes with teen and tween girls screaming loudly.

Oy.

Would I recommend the movie?

It depends. If you are 10 years-old (or maybe a bit older or younger…), yes, watch it. If you like Snoop Dogg or Usher or Miley Cyrus, yes watch it. If you are related to or mentor a 10 year-old or Snoop or Usher or Miley, yes watch it with them. If your favorite color is purple, yes watch it. If you’re looking for a way to help your kid sell out Madison Square Garden by the time he/she is 17 years-old, yes watch it.

Otherwise? Well, maybe you don’t have a reason to watch it. But never say never!

Mentoring Matters

January 26, 2012 in Children's Ministry, Friends, Fun, My Life, Youth Ministry with 0 Comments

My little sister Katie and I at the Evansville Icemen Game on Friday night

Just for a moment, close your eyes and picture yourself as a ten year-old. Think of all the adults who helped you be a kid every day.

I think of my mother. My father. My Godparents. My Sunday School Teacher Mrs. Graves. My church choir director Mrs. Barber-Pederson. My school music teacher Mrs. Birk. My fifth grade teacher Mr. Stone. There were others along the way who took time to love me.

I was blessed with a lot of adults who took time to nurture me, encourage me, develop my talents and help me find my way. I realize now how important those relationships were and still are in my life. I can picture people who came alongside me at all stages in my life and mentored me and helped me be a better version of myself. I’m grateful.

I am a Youth and Children’s Minister, a Big Sister with Big Brothers Big Sisters Henderson, a Girl Scout volunteer, and a Boy Scout parent because I realize the importance of adults taking time to build relationships with children and teenagers.

Today is National “Thank Your Mentor Day” and January is National Mentoring Month. Mentoring has always made a difference in my life–in official and unofficial capacities.

We can all mentor and nurture and encourage and love the kids in our lives.

If you’re a parent, be the best parent you can be to your children and look for ways to help them develop other meaningful relationships with their teachers, leaders and family members.

If you’re an adult with time to give (and really–we can always find time if it’s important enough), lead a Scout troop, become a Big, volunteer in a children’s or youth ministry at church, coach a little league team, give lessons, raise money to support organizations related to any of the above.

And guess what? If you mentor, you become a better version of yourself too! It’s really a win-win.

Reunion

October 23, 2011 in Friends, My Life, Pictures with 1 Comment

(Stephanie, Chris holding Piper, Angie, me, Ryan, Kelly holding Hannah)

Senior year of college, I had five roommates. Yesterday, Angie got married! It’s so fun to celebrate the big life events with my college friends. We live in five different states (Indiana, Kentucky, Ohio, Texas and Florida) and we’ve traveled to be with each other for weddings, bridal and baby showers and sometimes just because. Phones and facebook keep us together when we’re apart. I love these girls.

Angie was the last one of us to get married. It will be fun to see what other big life events bring us together as our families grow up.

(and we certainly missed Jenny, the Texas edition of our group…who was, oddly enough, in Boston during the festivities!)

September 15, 2011 in Friends, Fun with 0 Comments

“You have been my friend. That in itself is a tremendous thing. I wove my webs for you because I liked you. After all, what’s a life, anyway? We’re born, we live a little while, we die. A spider’s life can’t help being something of a mess, with all this trapping and eating flies. By helping you, perhaps I was trying to lift up my life a trifle. Heaven knows anyone’s life can stand a little of that.” E.B. White (Charlotte speaking in “Charlotte’s Web”)

Stories

May 29, 2011 in Family, Friends, Ministry, My Life, Writing with 1 Comment

Sometimes, between our two church services, I have some free time. This does not always happen, because I’m often teaching Sunday School or visiting Sunday School classes or holding babies in the nursery or dealing with whatever situation has arisen between the moment I arrive and when the first service ended. But sometimes, I have about 30 minutes free on a Sunday morning.

Today, I had free time. As I poured a cup of coffee and checked some text messages on my phone, I noticed Mr. Hedges, an octogenarian of our church family, sitting at the historic round table in our fellowship hall. I walked back to my office, dropped my phone on my desk and headed back for the round table. I settled into a chair across the table from him.

I entertained him with a story about how we had our early service in the courtyard and how the sunlight moved from one end of the courtyard to the other between 8:30 and 9:30 and about which church members ended up in direct sunlight by the prayer time and how the wind would gust and it blew my bulletin and music away while I was leading the opening songs. He told me stories about what was happening around his house. We looked at a bulletin together and he noted that we were using some Long Catechism questions in worship.

“Did you memorize the catechism when you were a child?” He wondered.

“No, sir,” I replied. “I grew up Presbyterian, but honestly, I didn’t even know there was a catechism until I was in college.”

“I memorized it when I was a boy. I don’t suppose children do that any more.”

“No, they don’t here anyway.” And then we talked for a moment or two about what children do in Sunday School these days–it’s a bit different than what either he or I remember from our respective childhoods.

We talked about departed church members, about homebound church members, about names I can’t remember or he can’t remember. We traded stories about this person or that person.

I’ve been trying to do this more and more. The people at Presbyterian Church in Henderson have become my extended family. I stay plenty busy, but on Sunday mornings and Wednesday nights, I try to spend time with my family.

I marvel at the stories each of us have filled our lives with–stories that are ours alone to share and tell. I think about my friend Mr. Hedges, and the stories he could tell about the life he’s lived. I want to listen to them and hear them. It makes me sad when I think about the stories that don’t get told and the stories I haven’t asked to hear.

This makes me think about the time I’m taking to hear stories. Probably not enough.

This also makes me think about the time I’m taking to tell stories. Possibly too much? I do like my stories. I do like to share my stories. I might do better to listen more and share less.

I guess this blog is a form of storytelling for me. I enjoy looking back on past entries and remembering events and things that happened. I think I’ll remember the events of my life better because I’ve taken the time to write them and read them.

Whose stories are you listening to? How are you telling yours?

UnConference: The Process

May 20, 2011 in Children's Ministry, Church, Family, Friends, Fun, Ministry, My Life with 2 Comments

It’s hard to even know where to begin writing about my UnConference experience, but for me, it’s important to write about it. If you’re not interested at all, it doesn’t hurt my feelings if you do not read about it.

I’ve shared that I am fascinated by the whole process of UnConference (that link is to the Wiki–it’s a thing that’s happening more and more in organizations/conferences). This particular UnConference (UnCo11) did not disappoint!

First the fees: we all simply paid for our room and board at Stony Point Center in Stony Point, NY. It was rather inexpensive for two nights and six meals.

Second the planning: Several fantastic people led us and did some planning ahead of time. Christopher Harris (@revrevwine), Carol Howard Merritt (@CarolHoward), Brian Merritt (@BrianMerritt) and Ryan Kemp-Pappan did some big thinking ahead of time. Meredith Kemp-Pappan (@mightymere) did some worship planning ahead of time (and some of it happened two hours before UnConferencing began) and Megan Dosher (@megateer) did some planning for Kid UnCo. And, of course, I know there were others who did some thinking and planning about specifics ahead of time. Otherwise, the planning for UnConference happened at UnConference.

Third the advertising: This happened mostly online. 78 people, adults and children, participated.

Fourth the theme: Unicorns. I have no idea how that happened, but it happened awesomely.

Everyone arrived at Stony Point (by plane, train and automobile–with many joking about the Unco11 Travel Curse) on Sunday and Monday.

The worship team (all people who volunteered to lead worship) met at 3:00 on Monday afternoon and planned Monday night’s worship. The idea was that each participant was bringing their unique gifts, instruments and resources and they created the worship service right there.

Then everyone met in the auditorium at 5:30 for instructions, updates, and assurances that at the end of UnCo11, we would be able to justify this as a Continuing Education event (despite the picture of Jesus riding a unicorn that appeared on the UnCo11 site currently).

After dinner, we gathered for worship. It was a beautiful, honest and holy experience.

After worship, the UnConferencing began. People suggested topics for discussion, along with a time and a room. Those topics were entered on the large chart on the wall. “Nerds and the Church!” “The New Horizon’s Study on Beattitudes (the study author, Margaret Aymer (@mayog), was with us–it would have been a missed opportunity to not discuss it with her)!” “Lay Ministry!” “Children in Worship!” “Addiction and Grace!” (you can see the whole list here.)

And then it happened: free time, meals, sleep, morning prayer, break out sessions, Kid Unco, the silent auction to raise money for three ministries, official conversations in conference rooms and unofficial conversations anywhere, Prayer Stations, Quaker Worship in the Meditation Space, communion, the tweet stream of #unco11 projected on a big screen, rain and a little bit of sunshine.

On Sunday morning, we chose six emphases that would “get legs” and be things that the community would continue to work on–online Presbyterian Women groups, a blog/site being created to share ideas about intergenerational ministry in local churches, an UnCo social justice emphasis on clean water (#h2o4all) and others that I just haven’t heard about yet (a report is coming soon–that will also help justify spending my Continuing Education money!).

In short–it was a whirlwind. All of this doesn’t even include the road trip with Mick (@MickBradley) and MB (@mbmccandless).

I know I plan to write about my experiences with Kid Unco and Children In Worship. At some point, I’d like to reflect on the Quaker Waiting Service I attended. It’s possible I’ll write about the things I’m discerning about my own vocation and call–but not right away. I’m still piecing that together and it’s still a little fresh and needs some time to settle and a chance for me to bounce it off some trusted friends.

It’s Friday. I got home last night, slept for 9 hours, have consumed much coffee and have plans for the day that include running, lifting weights, working on some stuff for Sunday, reading and catching up on news, email and with my friends/loved ones.

For The Better

April 18, 2011 in #RunRevRun, Friends, My Life, Youth Ministry with 2 Comments

photo © 2010 { QUEEN YUNA } | more info (via: Wylio)I had lunch with a friend the other day. During the course of our time together, she told me about some things that were happening for her professionally and some things that were happening between her and her co-workers. She’s finding that her co-workers are rather rude, are saying some harsh things to her and are not glad about any of her successes. “Jealousy,” I told her. “They’re jealous.”

It was obviously true. She’s hardworking and she knows that to be the best, she has to be the best.

In her profession, success is made through clients and sales. Her co-workers, I think, are missing the point. My friend is setting the bar high–they should be trying to reach it or set it higher. They should let my friend, their co-worker, enrich their experience in the profession. Instead, they are grumbling and turning on her.

I, for one, want to have people in my life who enrich it and cause me to be better and work harder. I want to cultivate friendships with people who know about different kinds of things and have different skills and talents and encourage me.

I made the move to this new site this weekend. I probably wouldn’t have bothered to learn so much about what that would take and probably wouldn’t have cared except for my friend, Nibby, who pulled me along and encouraged me that my web presence could be different. Keeping friends in my life who challenge me to go farther and help me do that is vital to me. My life is so much better because of them!

In my youth group, I always have one student (at least) who demands more of me. T’hey aren’t taking a lesson thrown together on Sunday afternoon, they aren’t just playing any stupid game and they aren’t going to ingest theology and ideas that I can’t present well. Currently, this student is a high school girl. She loves me and she trusts me to lead her–and she demands that I do it well. “Why did you choose this lesson?” she’ll honestly ask. “What do you have planned for Sunday night,” she’ll text on Tuesday. “So…is this all we’re going to do?” she wonder if we’re sitting around the youth room on a Sunday night shooting the breeze. She (and the students with high standards before her) cause me to be a better youth minister.

I participate in planning teams, discussion groups and boards that demand me to be prepared and bring something to the table. If I show up without anything to offer the group or if I am not doing some thinking and planning and question asking, I’m letting them down. A good example of this is my participation in the #RunRevRun site. Being part of that team demands that I am pulling my weight on the team, reading the instructions and emails that come my way, writing solid posts to contribute and doing my share of advertising and telling people about the site. If I don’t, I’m not fulfilling my responsibility as part of the team. This causes me to be a better writer and get a little bit better at promotion and advertising (I’m still working on that, but friends who are good at it are encouraging me!).

As an extension of that, being part of a community that encourages me to be healthy and get stronger and faster and in better shape has positive outcomes in many areas! I started training with the Couch To 5K Program last week because so many #runrevrun participants were using it and because my friend, Millie at See Millie Tri decided to give it a shot. Do I believe I’ll actually run a 5K one day? Because of these people, I believe it might happen (but let’s not get excited–I’m re-doing week 1 next week just to make sure I’m ready to do this)!

I don’t really feel like I have a lot of competition in my youth ministry job–and that’s probably because I meet, pray and pal around with many of the other youth ministers and leaders in town on a regular basis. Yet, even if it’s not competition, that group encourages me to do my best and challenges me with interesting discussions and ideas.

All this to say: Don’t be afraid of a little competition or to be friends with people who know more or who know about different things. They will make your life so much better and they will cause you to be the best you can be!

Who encourages you to work harder and do more?

Techno-fluence

July 29, 2010 in Friends, Random with 2 Comments

So I went to lunch with Nibby and Kathy yesterday. Spending time with either of them is always very fun and a little bit dangerous. Fun because Kathy and Nibby are each funny, entertaining and exciting people who do not go to my church (and as a church employee it’s pretty important for me to have friends who do not go to my church along with the dear friends who do). This was the first time the three of us spent time together, I think, but we are all three friends with each other. When we set it up, I thought, “this is going to be a good day,” and I was right.

It’s a little dangerous because Nibby loves gadgets even more than I do and while I dream about owning them he’s actually out buying them and telling me all about them and then I want them, too. Kathy also keeps up with a lot of the tech trends and I love all of it so the conversation lingered for awhile on technology and social media trends.

“How do you update Twitter?” Nibby asked casually. “Like, Tweetdeck, Tweetie, Tweettwittweettweettweet (I don’t actually know what he said, but it probably sounded kind of like that)?”

“Um…No?” I replied.

Well, that caught their attention. “What? Like…you just use Twitter? Oh, no, you need to get Tweetdeck.” They were both nodding and looking like they knew they had just saved me from certain doom.

So I went home and downloaded Tweetdeck.

And now it’s all over. Because I really kind of love it. I like that I can make it pink or blue or lime green or all three. I love that I can integrate Twitter and Facebook. I like that I can choose to update just Twitter or just Facebook or both at the same time. I like it that I can add columns of just the things I actually want to read and get to them quickly. I like how organized it is.

But mostly? I kind of get obsessed with keeping the columns empty. Which could be a bit distracting…

See, doesn’t that look better? This could be a problem.

In other news? I’ve been on the fence for weeks about what I’m going to do when I’m eligible for my phone upgrade with AT&T. Everyone (and I mean almost EVERYONE) keeps telling me to just get an iPhone. But I really like Jason’s Blackberry. And every time I start talking about getting a Blackberry, someone tells me about how that’s a bad idea because they/their cousin/someone they know has a Blackberry and hates it/the roller ball got messed up/it broke after 20 minutes.

“Play with my iPhone for awhile!” Someone will say, shoving it at me. “You’ll love it!”

And I do.

I really do kind of love it.

So I went to the AT&T store the other night and I played with the iPhones there and looked at all of the other kinds of phones. And then I went to lunch with Kathy and Nibby and they were all, “Just do it.” And I was all, “I’m not eligible for my upgrade yet.” And Nibby knows everyone (and I mean pretty much EVERYONE) and he knows the current manager and the former manager of the AT&T store in Henderson and darn if they both didn’t walk in together to have lunch where we were already having lunch.

Nibby gave it a good shot, but I still have to wait until September when I’m eligible for my upgrade, but I suppose when I am, I’ll get an iPhone and join the rest of the world (by which I mean most of the rest of the world and most of the people that you and I know. It’s really kind of ridiculous how many people have those things).

Also, Nibby brought his iPad to lunch and it made me feel a little bit drooly, but that’s another story I guess.

Note to conscientious readers: Yes, I know this post is obnoxiously materialistic. I’m aware that not using Tweetdeck, not knowing which phone to get and not having any hope of owning an iPad are definitely First World Problems. Thanks for indulging me, as usual.

Why Becky Blogs

February 18, 2010 in Family, Friends, Fun with 6 Comments

Back in 2005, several of my UE friends (and UE related friends) began blogs on blogspot. Kristina, Katie, Sarah, Tamara (and eventually even stubborn Jenny) kept in touch with each other’s lives by updating their blogs. After reading their entries for awhile, I decided I wanted one, too.

So I started this very blog site that you are now reading. For a long time, my only goal was to update it with enough frequency that people didn’t forget about me completely. These days, I’m managing to post a little more often.

I don’t have a lot of readers. Several of my friends, family members, and occasionally even my husband read my blog daily or weekly. Every so often I’m surprised by someone who sheepishly admits that they were reading my blog. (By the way, I don’t keep my blog a secret. I put links to it right in my email and have a link to it on my facebook page. You don’t have to be embarrassed for having excellent taste in online reading material.) I’m grateful for any of you that would take time to care about what I have to say or about what our family is doing.

Occasionally, someone will ask me, “Why do you keep a blog online?” Maybe they think it’s narcissistic. Maybe they think it’s too public. Maybe they’re just curious about why someone would journal online in the first place. I have a few reasons, I suppose.

The first reason is the reason I started blogging: I like to keep in touch with friends. Back before we were using facebook, our blogs were a way to check in with each other. I wrote in my blog because I wanted them to write in their blogs. I updated so they would see pictures of the first day of school or our new cat or what our Christmas tree looked like and hear stories about funny things that happened or accomplishments and struggles in our lives. I checked their blogs to learn the same things about their lives and families. Most of these friends (and a few others) still continue to blog regularly. And there are a few that I wish would blog more often (cough JENNY cough).

Second, I am rather introverted. It’s my nature to be pretty shy and I tend to process things inside before I speak them out loud, if I even speak them out loud at all. In big groups, I’m not usually the one talking unless it’s part of my job to do the talking. If I feel comfortable around you, you probably know me as a bit more talkative than other people do. My mother heard this all the time at parent teacher conferences in elementary school: “Becky’s just so quiet!” at which point she would laugh for days, I’m sure, because I was most certainly NOT so quiet at home. At the same time, I’m not really a private person and even if I’m quiet, there is still A LOT going on inside my head. I like to share my thoughts and stories with others. This site gives me an opportunity to comfortably share what’s going on in my mind and in my life with whoever takes the time to read it.

Third, I have always loved to write. I used to keep a notebook and eventually a computer disk of short stories I was writing. Writing skills go stale if you don’t use them. Especially lately I have felt challenged to flex my writing muscles by updating my blog on a daily basis. And the truth that I have discovered is that the more I write, the more I want to write and the easier it is to write and think of things to write. The simple fact is that if one wants to be a writer, it is necessary for one to engage in the process of writing.

I guess the last reason I blog, and also the most important reason that I blog, is for me. I love reading old entries and remembering things that happened that I recorded with words and pictures. I enjoy writing and thinking and finding pictures to post. I love the satisfaction of hitting “publish” and knowing that I’ve recorded something else. It makes me happy and I think that even if no one else read it, I would still write it.

Those are the reasons I continue to post entries here. Do you blog? Why do you do it?