1. If you wear pearls and expensive or dangly earrings to the gym, I’m probably judging you just a little bit.
2. I completely understand why some people prefer to text than make phone calls.
3. I’ve attempted to destroy the orange carpet at the church several times (sometimes on accident). If someone doesn’t replace it, I’ll eventually succeed. It’s only a matter of time.
4. I type faster than you do.
5. Dear Post-It Note Creator: Thanks!
6. I’m not planning to have a baby. No, there’s nothing wrong. No, I won’t change my mind.
7. I’m not a fan of the song “Awesome God.”
8. God loves you even if you’re ____________. Maybe even especially because you’re __________.
9. I would rather lose my wallet than my phone
10. When you call me “ma’am” a little part of me dies a sad death.